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KY Pimps – Vanessa

September 19, 2005 2 Comments

Here’s yet another pimp post, backed by popular demand after FA and Xaviera were featured not terribly long ago. You know the drills, you know the rules, check the previous posts to avoid any confusion. Lets get it on!

Name: Vanessa
Age: Barely Legal
Weight: Lighter than yours truely
Height: Taller than yours trulely when on 4″ heels
Occupation: College Student
Speciality: Pool, though I pwned her with my noob skills.
X factor: A nyonya, how many of those do you find? Ah, and she blogs too, at

A simple girl who likes to play pool, shop, sleep, party and such. Loves to eat McD fries and slurping ice cream, so definately not one of those high maintenance type. At the tender age of 19, she still qualifies as a teen, so some of you old farts can stay away. But if you are still in your twenties, you are qualified to date her, and I assure you that some of them guys will be looking at you with envious eyes thinking “WTF how did this fugly d00d be able to go out with this cute ngonya chick?

Vanessa pimped
She plays pool, didn’t I tell ya?

KY pimping vanessa
See, I didn’t just get her picture from some online paysite, I really do know her!

To date her:
Let the bidding begin! Highest bidder gets the deal, well, of course she must agree to it. Money goes to SPCA, or some other charity Peter Tan specifies.

This is high class college sweetie, don’t get left behind!


Following the insanely popular but morally not-so-correct pimping FA, here comes the next installation. Yes ladies and gentlemen, I’m pimping again, and we have Xaviera on the auction block.

Again, as a disclaimer, I’ll have to tell you that this is by no means sexually related. It’s all about getting you to enjoy a nice evening with this lady, if you are the higgest bidder, of course. So here goes!

insane cleavageIntroduction:
Name – Xaviera
Age – Twenties
Weight – It’s a secret, but properly distributed, you’ll see
Height – Probably around 5’4 or so?
Speciality – Drink & dance, and sometimes whack the shit out of the sandbag
X Factor – Motherly figure, won’t starve the baby.

This girls know how to party, and yet have a softer, more domesticated side. She doesn’t need to be that high maintenance chick who insists on fine dining on cavier and champaign. As you can see, she gets satisfaction from Burger King and McDs too. You can’t find these kinda chicks around KL easily, now can you?

Xaviera pimped

To Date her:
As some of you might have read about the FA pimping post, this is no different. It’s all about getting a decent date for Xaviera, for example, she might not enjoy it if you bring her jogging and all you do is running in front of her, in reverse, with your eyes fixed staring at particular parts of her body.. that’s a no no.

So .. gentlemen, start you bidding! (with a Daytona theme…. kinda goes well with those headlights)


I have formally recieved a request from FA to let me pimp her. Now, by definition, pimp means “Arrange for sexual partners for others” for a small fee, that is. Just thought I should make things clear to avoid confusion.

Name – FA
Age: quarter century young
Weight: below 50kg, can’t say that for every girl these days
Height: more than 5 feet, dont’ ask
Occupation: classified, but hates her work
Speciality: ranting, but occasionaly cute
X factor: great in dancing, sometimes described as “babboon on chili padi”

This girl knows how to have a good time with you too. Just look at the photos below. 1.She parties good, 2. will drink till puke, 3. passing out on the bench and then 4. hug the mamak stall’s table. How lovely is that? A night out with her will gurantee a smashing time!

She enjoys good books, anime (naruto), movies, and shopping at ikea buying things nobody knows the actual usage nor her intended usage.

To Date Her:
This is a pimp post, so of couse it’s all about getting FA a decent date. And since by the definition of “pimp” earlier described, a small fee is to be paid, commensurate with the relative attractiveness of the client. (she wants hot guys).

If you’re interested, kindly leave your details on the comment and I will get back to you if you are chosen as a prospective client. Remember, this is high class stuff.